a mindful month-end : June 2019

at the end of last week I was making a plan to catch up with friends I haven’t seen in a while and check in with my doctors for check ups , check ins and unfulfilled appointments. Little did I know on Sunday afternoon I would receive a call that a long time friend who also happens to be a great friend’s husband, had passed on and the very next day I would be rushed to hospital from where we had gathered to pay respects to the family and start grieving our loss. As I lay in this here hospital bed , I am aware of the loss, the gravity of the proximity to it . But I haven’t started to really feel it. I know what has happened but it feels like its above me. All I care or can think to do is find the best way to be there for my friend , to continue to hold on to the great memories I shared with our friend, her husband, and to leave this hospital and do EVERYTHING I need to do to not return the same way I arrived.

attitude : GRATITUDE, I realise I am living on the prayer and positive thoughts & actions from so many people. a great many I don’t even know personally. This does not go unnoticed I am so humbled and appreciative because it is possibly your energy and good intentions upon my life that the gods use to continue to offer me chances in this life. Thank you Distinguished.

Luxury – Breathing. That and this new craving I have for sweet treats.

Oh Snap : We are now the adults in the room. This month alone I have watched a friend start a life with his new parter and some of the adult that comes with that, the other day my other friend lost a partner and now we are about to get in with all that brings. I go to the Dr with my parents , I sign my own consent forms. The doctor asks me a huge question and my parents look back at me and say ” Well…It’s up to you” and it’s not manipulation, they mean it sincerely. HOW DID WE GET HERE!!!?

Focus : Therapy, Rest and Healing. I need all these things to show up for myself and I really want to show up for my friend. I love you Rumbi. This is you, you got this. But, WE GOT YOU.

Rest In Peace M.A

I wish you a peaceful end to the first half of the year xo

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